I have never lived alone without a dog. Without people, often enough, and I’m loving it now, as usual. I’ve only been dogless while living with other folks. Solo doglessness turns out to be a painful mixed bag. Freedom, travel plans! Wagging dog kiss deprivations. No one to pretend to be talking to while thinking out loud. Meanwhile, I’ve been talking to myself, for months now, since I babbled in my cave. Now, in every room of this house– blab, blab, all the time. Sadly, it dawns on me that my voice has no limitations; I can shout and scream, laugh and cry, as loud and long as I like, without worrying about worrying my canine protector. FREEDOM!
I talk to myself, to the Goddess, to the stuffed elephants, to the blankets and chairs, to my precious ghosts, fictions, and obsessions. I talk to “stevie,” which turns out to be the name for my phone, derived from hours of listening to Steve Forbert songs and having wonderful fun ya-ya conversations with the person I imagine this sweet brilliant singer to be.
I listen to myself, and laugh to notice that I say, when delighted or surprised, “Oh mein Gott, shone dogge”… or however one spells “oh my god; good dog!” in German. This comes from a long ago old lady ghost of mine, and the dear ghost dog she loved. Edith and Hanna. I am not alone.
PS: Dog-lover video, Steve singing, song link below. Tech experiment. Someone needs to teach me how to buy music for stevie to play off net.